Paikus

I’m pretty sure this is the greatest video ever recorded:

Pikas. Who knew? I mean, I knew there was such a thing as a pika, and that it was not a rodent, but I didn’t know how adorable and extremely irritating they were. The combination makes them quickly come into contention for my favorite animals short list, which is very short and very competitive.

In celebration of this loquacious lagomorph, I’ve invented a new poetic form that is mostly a haiku, but it has to end in an urgent, all-capped, and repetitive line, e.g.,

Strident squeaks resound
through the mountainous summer:
KEEP AWAY! I’M HERE!
KEEP AWAY! I’M HERE!
KEEP AWAY! I’M HERE!
KEEP AWAY! I’M HERE!
KEEP AWAY! I’M HERE!

I figure this is too awesome an invention to keep to myself, so please contribute your own paikus! I’m fairly liberal when it comes to syllable counts, but the traditional scheme is

5 syllables
7 syllables
5 SYLLABLES!
5 SYLLABLES!
5 SYLLABLES!

With the third line repeated ad nauseum.

Leave your contribution in the comments. IF I get enough replies to make this into a contest, and IF I deem a prizeworthy winner, I will indeed bestow an appropriate prize, most likely a toy pika. Now go forth and rock me with poetry.

P.S. Pikas need not be the subject of a Paiku, but all the better if they are.
P.P.S. If you think this sounds like fun, please consider blogging, tweeting, Facebooking, and otherwise sharing the link among your poetically inclined social circle.

Edit: THIS CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED but feel free to post your paikus; I would love to see them.

20 thoughts on “Paikus

  1. I spy a film crew
    and David Attenborough
    SEE HOW CUTE I AM!
    SEE HOW CUTE I AM!
    SEE HOW CUTE I AM!
    SEE HOW CUTE I AM!

  2. Inspired by the kids, who just received a rabbit zhu-zhu.

    Pika peeking out
    Not a rabbit. Not a mouse.
    NOT A ZHU-ZHU PET!?
    NOT A ZHU-ZHU PET!?
    NOT A ZHU-ZHU PET!?
    NOT A ZHU-ZHU PET!?

  3. Admittedly, it’s not every day that a new contender can make both your favorite animals short list and your favorite short animals list, but I am bothered by their lack of offensive/defensive capabilities. It would be much cooler if they collected the poison and shot it out of forward-facing grooves in their big front teeth. Until then:

    Fierce, furry hubris:
    Pipsqueaks think that they’re all that.
    RELEASE THE SNAKES!
    RELEASE THE SNAKES!
    RELEASE THE SNAKES!

  4. Yellow rodent sings
    “I will animate your life”
    IN YOUR DREAMS SUCKER!
    IN YOUR DREAMS SUCKER!
    IN YOUR DREAMS SUCKER!

    __________________

    ooops, wrote about Pikachu
    oh well.

    – Sean

  5. Seniors gather plates
    Elbows thrown for fresh crab legs
    EARLY BIRD SPECIAL?
    EARLY BIRD SPECIAL!?
    EARLY BIRD SPECIAL!

  6. From Helo:

    The strident pika
    Makes Lush Puppy’s ears swivel.
    PLEASE MAKE THE NOISE STOP!
    PLEASE MAKE THE NOISE STOP!
    PLEASE MAKE THE NOISE STOP!

    From me:

    Oh my god, so cute!
    So tiny, furry, and loud.
    I NEED A PIKA!
    I NEED A PIKA!
    I NEED A PIKA!

  7. Unassuming beast
    Is surprisingly vocal
    PIKA IN THE HOUSE!
    PIKA IN THE HOUSE!
    PIKA IN THE HOUSE!
    PIKA IN THE HOUSE!

  8. Excitement in space,
    Pushing the limits of man.
    WARNING: CHECK FUEL TANK
    WARNING: CHECK FUEL TANK
    WARNING: CHECK FUEL TANK
    WARNING: CHECK FUEL TANK
    WARNING: CHECK FUEL TANK

  9. He’s of the people.
    And lives on an upper lip.
    PAVANO’S MOUSTACHE!
    PAVANO’S MOUSTACHE!
    PAVANO’S MOUSTACHE!
    PAVANO’S MOUSTACHE!
    PAVANO’S MOUSTACHE!

  10. Contribution from Diego Pedulla-Smith (my son, age 9)

    Disc going around
    Complete circles smooth and black
    AN AWESOME RECORD
    AN AWESOME RECORD
    AN AWESOME RECORD

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